Social Networking: How Do I Know My Net’s Working? or Yep, I Totally Suck at This

Author, Anne R. Allen recently posed an intriguing question on her blog. The post heading:

Does Social Networking Make You Feel like Your Back in High School?

Read it. How much of it do you agree and/or disagree with it?

Many of you reading this are fantastic social networkers. You cast your net and draw out a boat full of fish. You’re well-spoken (I guess, well-typed in this instance), leave thoughtful feedback, and engage other writers with genuine relationship building skills and carefully presented self-promotion. You’ve got tons of Twitter, Facebook, and blog followers.

Me, I’m terrible at small talk and self-promotion. And don’t get me started on my net-flinging skills.

I often ponder; how social does a writer have to be? Personally, I’m not a social butterfly. For that matter, I’m not even a social caterpillar. In fact, truthfully, I write so I don’t have to speak aloud. I understand that as a writer, I have to take responsibility in promoting myself via all available media outlets. And I know this may include public readings, mingling with like-minded individuals, and general social schmoozing. I know this…yet, I remain hesitant to participate. Why? I think Ms. Allen’s right; to me, in a lot of ways, social networking is like high school all over again. There are the cool kids, and then there are the rest of us. Sadly (although there’s the hint of a smile as I type this), my high school no longer exists. The building was torn down. Terrible, I know. But I don’t have many fond memories. Of course (and please feel free to refer to my psychologist for further details), this may be due to my own self-induced ostracism.

Anyway, I do spend time lurking the halls of Twitter; waste time in front of my Facebook locker, nervously pretending to search for a textbook that doesn’t exist, willing myself to turn invisible. Is this something innate in me? Can a non-social person/writer flip the coin and change? I’m not shy; I’m just somewhat…disconnected, disconcerted.

Anne speaks of feeling ignored on social networks. I partake in conversations, add my two cents when opportunity presents itself, but the drive to engage individuals, who may or may not be who they portray (especially online), usually leaves something to be desired. And selfishly I think, man, I should be using this time to create.

I’d like to build stronger relationships with writers. I’d like to see more folk read my book, The Man of Shadows (like how I worked in a hyperlink to Amazon here?), AND have it increase in sales. But how do I successfully balance between writing and networking?

And with that question (yes, and now my sad attempt to throw my net out and gather ye little fishes up), I leave the mike open for social commentary.